Just Simply Jen

Today I found something out that really just irritated me. Earlier this year my cousin, who is a Marine, came back from being overseas for a year. He wasn't in a war zone but still wasn't exactly in a fun place. A few weeks after he got home I was told by someone in my family that he and his wife were separating and he was trying to work it out. Sometime in the past two months they divorced and that was it. I never knew what happened and I was ok with that because, honestly, they had everything against them from the beginning. They dated for a long time but it was always long distance as they met when he was in basic and then he did a year overseas. They married a week before he was sent to the sand box for a year. Six months after he was back from there he was sent on this last overseas stint. Not exactly the ideal situation to nurture a new marriage. I was sad about the divorce because I knew how much he loved her, but he seemed ok so I was ok.
Today my cousin called here and talked to my sister for a while. During the conversation she found out that she actually left him when he was still overseas. She didn't find out the reason or anything, because he's not the type to go around telling unnecessary details and I totally respect that. One thing was very clear though. It was in no way what he wanted.
To me I equal this with me leaving my husband while he's overseas. I mean we've had a lot longer to build the foundation of our marriage, but he loves me as much as my cousin loved his wife. I could never imagine hurting him that much. How often is it that you find someone who will love you so completely and what makes us as people so willing to just throw that away. I was watching a movie last night and a little girl in it says that her mom told her she was always waiting for something better to come along.
Sure something better might come along, but how in the hell are you going to know that when it took years to get to where you were. How can you equate new relationship with a love that has had years to blossom? Is it worth losing a love that is great just because there might be something better out there? I don't think so. I mean maybe I was wrong to think that she loved him as much as he loved her, but I just don't get it. Maybe she just couldn't deal with the lifestyle of the military she married into. Funny thing is he would have given it up if she'd only waited another year. I just hope it was worth it because someone else is going to get what she had.
Now I know there are those of you out there reading this thinking I'm just incredibly biased because he's my cousin, but I'm not. He's not the first one in my family to have their marriage end and, trust me, I call it like I see it. He never would have married her if he didn't completely love and adore her. He's seen too many marriages fail for it to be worth it otherwise. Our family doesn't exactly have a great track record for marriage.
I just hope that one day he finds the happiness he deserves and that, if there is someone else out there reading this who has been wondering if they should move on because they might find something better, that they will make sure it's worth possibly losing the best thing and never finding that something better.